Podcast Series – Sacred Sex and Relationships

This 28 minute program features Johanna Carroll, international spiritual teacher and author who discusses the new model of intimacy and relationships that leads you to getting the divine partnership your soul deserves. Johanna’s audio voice is direct and thoughtful and will leave you with a deeper sense of the value of a relationship that feeds your body, mind and spirit! We are entering a time where there is a new paradigm or belief system of relationships that is emerging. See where you are in this new paradigm and how you can live it today for greater joy and harmony in all your relationships.

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Sacred Sex and Relationships

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Podcast Transcripts

So the intention of these programs is not to give psychic readings or anything like that but really to have the ability to share my actually 45 year journey; probably even longer than that if I count all the other lifetimes, of what it is to live a life that’s really fulfilling; where you feel blessed every day, great friends, plenty of money, the ability to travel. It took a lot of leaps of faith to get here. So my job I think right now this time in my life is to talk to you, not to teach you, not to lecture you, not to be a mum scolding you, but just to share information. So I think we learn best through our own experiences.

I do a lot of psychic readings for people I’ve done three major television shows; I used to actually have my own little talk show in San Diego. I still own a home over there so I travel back and forth and I’ve written three books. So if you want to check out any of that stuff you’re more than welcome, just type johannacarroll.com which will also take you into other stuff. I’m not here to sell you anything I’m here to talk.

So the whole thing about messages from spirit is listening to your own messages, answering your questions and really going from there. So let’s start out this way. I speak to thousands of women particularly every year. I probably have more female clients than I do male clients; I love my male clients I really do. I’ve found that when a guy really commits to wanting a deeper spiritual connection; and we’re not talking about religion here, we’re talking about more value in your life, who am I, where am I going, who am I doing that with? It comes up a lot, not just for women but for men too. But there’s always the theme.

The relationship theme is the big one. So let’s talk about that today. Let’s talk about sacred relationships, let’s talk about the difference between a relationship and a partnership, let’s talk about what it takes to get there, the difference between dating and being selective. Understanding sacred sex; what does that body really mean? This is not a puritanical perspective this is a spiritual perspective.

So metaphysics as I said in my introductory segment, Meta is a Greek word and it means beyond. So metaphysics is beyond the physical. So when we talk about metaphysics spirituality and all that, are we talking about the mystical ways of life? Maybe. Are we talking about something that’s sacred? Absolutely.

There’s a big difference between being a spiritual person and a religious person. It doesn’t mean one is better than the other I think you can be religious and very spiritual at the same time. I remember when I was a little kid though; I lived next door to this family. They were very Irish catholic, big family and I don’t want to say any names because I could probably get in trouble. But anyway, they would go to church the father Tom, he would go to church every single day. He was such a good catholic man.

I remember when I was a little kid, on Saturdays I had to clean my room that kind of stuff and I remember putting stuff away and hearing yelling outside the window. It was the fall, time for raking the leaves and that kind of thing in New England and there was Mr. Wonderful religious Tom taking a rake and beating his son with it. So this is the man that went to church every day and he abuses his kids. To me there’s hypocrisy in that. How can you be a spiritually balanced individual and abusive? That’s a question you might want to think about.

We know there’s lots of different kinds of abuses, any of you who’ve experienced that in any kind of a relationship whether it’s a parent or a teacher or a boss or a girlfriend, boyfriend that kind of thing; even your friends; what does that really mean to be spiritual in these kinds of relationships? Why do we allow certain behavior to be okay just so we can feel we are part of something? When we know at night when we lay our head on that pillow that something’s off.

So today let’s talk a little bit about that one-on-one relationship. I’m going to start it out this way. The one-on-one relationship if it’s really the most important is the one you have with yourself. It’s kind of like that old quest, who am I? You can travel the whole entire universe you are a holy being. Did you forget that? So we’re told that as a spiritual being we have a desire to experience life. Some of you may be saying “Oh my gosh why did I ever decide to chose that? Why didn’t I just stay up there floating around on those clouds eating chocolates?” Well first of all you don’t float around eating chocolates there’s work to do over there too, there’s just no pain and suffering which is the beauty of it.

So as a spiritual being we choose a life for experience so that our dualistic nature, the human side of you can have experiences, learn the value of those experiences, some people refer to them as lessons. That’s kind of antiquated language. But we absorb the knowledge, the awareness from that experience whether it’s a person or a place or a job.

Let’s talk about personal relationships, and then the soul says “But hello I’m here I want to evolve, you want to grow as a person and become a better person and have life show up for you in a grand way and I as your soul need evolution.” So how do we feed the soul to have evolution?

When we grow as a person we receive knowledge. Spiritual knowledge is often referred to as awareness. A sense that there’s something deeper going on. Yang Ying psychology it’s called the hidden self. But we’re really not going into that model right now we’re really just talking about the spiritual quest. So the soul says “You’re here as this divine power poured into the body having a human experience, and I’m in partnership with you and so you’ve got to pay attention to me, the soul.”

So the way the soul has evolution, in Christianity they would refer to this as resurrection in metaphysics or new age language which is really old age language we refer to this as a time of ascension, rising above our own limitations. In the Buddhist tradition; I’m not Buddhist but I have studied it, they refer to this as the four noble truths. That there’s suffering in the world, mankind is aware that there’s suffering, mankind chooses suffering; interesting concept right? Mankind knows there’s a way out of suffering and can rise above it. Suffering in many of the Buddhist traditions is also referred to as addictions and this is not just about alcohol and drugs, it’s also about relationship addictions as well.

What’s a relationship addiction? It’s a repetitive pattern that we go over and over again. It’s kind of like that thing we say about insanity; insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. So around your relationships whether they are friends or intimate relationships, let’s talk about intimate relationships. What is your pattern?

See here’s the thing, to grow spiritually or for that soul to evolve there’s three different things that have to be going on, it’s sort of in my language the new holy trinity it’s called the triumph ray, it’s a threefold path, let’s just call it that, the threefold path. There has to be belief in a higher power.

Now what that is for you is private and personal. It could be a religious model that your following which is great, it could be that you believe that there is such a thing as God and a higher power and that’s pretty much all you know, you would like to have a personal experience but you’re not quite sure how to get there. So the belief in a higher power is there, don’t worry about the language.

The second thing is called the psyche of the soul. This is more of a cognitive process and so would we call it a psychological model? On some level it is, it goes back to who am I. So who do you think you are? You are a woman or a man, right? You have wants and desires and obviously want to live the best life that you can, correct?

Here’s the thing I believe that a spiritual person in the psyche of the soul knows how to set boundaries. They know who they are they know who they are not. They know if they’re going to a bar on a Friday night and they’ve had five cocktails and they’re going home with some guy that they don’t even know. They’ve got to know on some deep level, this may not serve them for their best highest and holiest good. It’s not a judgment it’s a choice, you’ve got free will.

So the boundary is related to a pattern of behavior. Cognitively and in psychology we would say that is setting a boundary, I know who I am I know who I am not; this just doesn’t work for me anymore. So we change the pattern, so we change the behavior. Here’s how the behavior changes, it’s sort of a reversed model. You have to feel it inside your soul first if change is necessary, you have to want that, your life is going to be a little different. If it’s the kind of people that you’re attracting for relationships look at your pattern. Because the pattern is activated by the soul for the desire to have experience, two to learn the knowledge and to apply the wisdom. For the soul to have evolution the soul says “You’ve got to change something.”

So the first thing that we change is our awareness, it’s called the consciousness shift. So the mind consciously “I’m awake, I’m aware, I’m ready, I’m going to do things a little differently. The desire to make the change is all universe really needs, that’s the starting point. Then what happens is the soul as a vehicle of intelligence starts to really speak to your intuition.

So maybe you go to the bar again on a Friday night, maybe the same guy shows up and wants to party and you’re like, “You know it just doesn’t feel right,” that’s you honoring the boundary. So here’s what happens the soul begins to talk to you and believe me sometimes the soul can bang you over the head by creating a crisis situation; it’s a great opportunity for change, hopefully you don’t get to that point. It’s awareness shift.

I really am speaking to a lot of people men and women right now, they want a quality relationship. They want relationship that’s based on sacred love not on fear and that lower field of vibration, it’s called the lower chakra. Chakra is a Sanskrit word it means gateway, or doorway, or opening. We’re told that we have these seven gateways that connect our physical beings with our spiritual beings. The root chakra is, so think of a spiral of light that’s spinning and this is that the root chakra is the tail bone. So it’s also we’re working within the polarity of either love or fear, right? We’re making choices based on love or fear based consciousness.

The root chakra is called the divine feminine energy; it’s not about being a woman, it’s about being creative. Man that’s where your powerhouse is. Any of you that are musicians or artists or writers this is where you are inspired from. Think of that red light that just shoots up your spinal column and goes right up into your brain and wow all of a sudden the ideas are floating. That’s the top level. It also is connected by the way to your sexual organs.

So are you living your creativity through having sex? Or are you expressing your divine self in a creative manner through another form? Or honoring the sacredness of your divine self to create a healthy boundary and wait for another soul that recognizes the precious part of your soul. You might want to think about that for a moment. I’m not scolding you. Where are you with that?

Sometimes we think it’s all or nothing, it’s not obsessive compulsive like there aren’t any good men out there. Gosh I hear that that so much. But I know it’s not true because I have a lot of them for clients and they’re saying the same thing. So I need to put you guys all in the same room together. It’s your value system, it’s your habits, it’s your boundaries, it’s your patterns. If you want a different kind of man or woman to show up in your life look at your patterns.

So first we have the belief system of the soul. Then the second thing we have the psyche of the soul. Who am I, who am I not. This works, this doesn’t work. This is for my best highest and holiest good, this is yucky I’m not feeling good I just can’t do that anymore.

The third thing is the quantum physics piece and that can get a little bit out there but let’s just talk about it a little bit. So we’re told that we’re all energy, everything is energy. If you scrape a little piece of your skin and put it under a microscope you would see there’s movement there. You are not this big block of flesh that’s stagnant and solid, you’re always in movement.

When the star seed thought was created for your soul to have another life experience for growth as a person and evolution as a soul, so that you could merge more into the divine wholeness. Lots of things got downloaded into all that DNA, the codes they’re called divine imprints. So you have a divine plan you also have a genetic code. Lots of people say well I have a predisposition to X, Y and Z due to biochemistry. On a physical plane that can be very true but it doesn’t mean that if your soul is really dedicated and your body, mind and spirit are working together that you cannot have a shift around that. So because you came from a divorced family that’s that mean you have a predisposition to being divorced? No but you probably have some stuff that if you haven’t worked through it, it may come up as a pattern.

So what’s the difference between a relationship and a partnership? I think that if we’re all really honest with ourselves, it’s the divine partnership that we’re seeking and it has to start with you first. It’s kind of like that old saying it just drives people nuts sometimes; you can’t really love anyone beyond the level that you love yourself. You’ve got to fall in love with yourself first before you can love another.

On some level I would probably rework the language and say, “To receive the kind of divine partnership that you want, where you cherish one another, where you honor one another where you respect one another, where you merge together in intimacy of sacred sex and unionship, you have to find the spirit within you. That has to happen first.

So do you fall in love with yourself or do you recognize your own wholeness? Do you recognize what keeps you whole? Do you change all patterns? We’re told that the new temple of learning on the earth right now is relationships and that each person is a mirror for us to take a look at our own reflection. What does that really mean? When someone is doing something our reaction to it, is it…first of all let’s be clear on this, nobody makes you feel anything.

You’re feelings belong to you and you have to take ownership for that. If you are on a dialogue in a relationship, things that are bugging you you’ve got to say “When this happens this is how I feel.” Particularly for a man or a woman the minute you start to point a finger and say “When you do this blah blah blah,” you just back that person into a corner and you will not get cooperation on any level. Own your own stuff, find your own voice and speak about the situation in a neutral way since you’re not pointing a finger. This is evolved soul connection conversation.

So a divine partnership are two people that are walking on the same path, with the same desire, the same intention, a similar value system and a model for behavior that honors the divine in each of them. This has nothing to do with religion; it’s recognizing and honoring the divine and sacredness within each being.

Now what’s the difference between a relationship and a partnership? A relationship the commitment is not there. How many have been okay… I met a woman recently; I really like her a lot. She had a boyfriend that decided he was going to move in, I guess they agreed on it. She said the next thing she knew he was there. So here’s a little aside on that, ladies and gentlemen there is a business aspect to every relationship do not be afraid to discuss how you’re going to handle bills, finances, the grocery bill, the gas bill and everything else. You’ve got to sit down and have a business meeting and be practical, okay?

So she said “I was trying to be modern and he wanted an open relationship and he was very clear that he was not only dating women having coffee, lunch, dinner but sleeping with them as well and I tried to be modern.” Wow! I said “That’s pretty phenomenal. So how did that feel for you?” She said “I started to get sick to my stomach and I knew that I wasn’t being honest to myself and I asked him to leave.” So the question I asked her was, “What was the blessing in that?” The blessing is the awareness.

So the awareness is what did she learn about herself? She learnt that she really is traditional, that she’s not okay with bringing the energy of another woman into her home. Now some of you might say “Well of course not.” But you would be very very surprised at what some people will do just so that they can feel they’re in a relationship. That’s a relationship that’s not a partnership. So spend the time use, the 12 date rule. Don’t get intimate with anyone for 12 dates this is a challenge. Sit down let’s talk, really get to know who they are.

When you open your body up to intimacy and I mean sharing sex not making love. You’re bringing the whole energy field of that individual person into your body. Your body is sacred it’s a temple and how many of you have perhaps been too intimate too soon with someone and regretted it afterward? Take the time to get to know who they are. But here’s the thing you’ve got to know yourself first, so get clear before you’re out there dating, doing relationships, moving towards a partnership, get it out on a pad of paper ask yourself what’s the difference between a relationship and a partnership. Is it my desire to be in a partnership? Maybe it’s not, if you’re okay with just dating, fine. But take care of yourself, set healthy boundaries.

We’re told by the universe that when a man and a woman is in divine sacred unionship making love, they are sharing the highest part of the vibration of their soul and that the guides and teachers are honoring this as a sacred union. It’s just like marriage its one of the most sacred contracts there is. Are problems going to show up? Of course they are. It’s how you handle them in adult-like evolved manner that’s going to determine whether you’re in a relationship or a partnership. It’s not about all or nothing, it’s about learning to communicate and talk and really speak from the power of your own soul.

Find out, where is this person’s belief system, spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically? Before you share that sacred part of your body, understand that you’ve just opened your entire field body, mind and spirit to the energy of a stranger. Take the time to get to know this other person.

So we have what’s called the divine current that exists within us we’re going to talk about this more the next time. How do I connect to the divine current? Happiness will not come; and this is going to freak you out from anything outside of you. True happiness that’s constant which is the natural state of the soul we call it joy and the bliss state, only comes from the divine connection. If you want to feel more love from a person and with that other person, to be honored yourself with a precious part of you, you’ve got to connect on a divine level or it will fail you every single time.

So start with a partnership between you, God, spirit, universe first and then wait and see if the people that are showing up in your life change. When your vibration shifts and changes your soul calls in the divine song of the heart which is meant to nurture, heal and bring you a new way of life so I really think we need to talk a lot more about this. But I hope this is good food for thought.

So here’s the question are you in a partnership or a relationship? Which do you want to be in if you’re not in either one? What’s the desire? Start the relationship with yourself get to know who you are spend some time alone there’s nothing wrong with that, this is not mental time. Whether you call it prayer, meditation, going for a walk taking a bubble bath or just sipping a nice cup of tea. Don’t be afraid to spend some time with yourself so that God can start to talk to you and point you in the direction that’s for your best highest and holiest good. If you are in a beautiful loving relationship, I bless you a million times and don’t be afraid to tell your friends why it works. If you are in a relationship and a partnership, honor its sacredness. You do not have to regurgitate every detail of what’s going on to your friends, keep it precious and keep it sacred and that way it will serve you and your partner in a truly wonderful way

So I bless you with this and this is Johanna Carroll and the name of our show is messages from spirit and we’re under the podcast title of spirituality. Many blessings. Don’t be afraid to send any emails I’d love to answer some questions that you might have that everyone can benefit from. So have a great, great day. Bye, bye.

 

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